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Sunday, September 24, 2006


i haven't posted for quite sometime. i hate to say it, but i'm in deep shit. as i've posted in one of my previous entry, my mom and i have issues. now this one is big. i fucking hate her! no, that's an understatement, "I FUCKING LOATHE HER!!!" there, whew, i've said it. don't care if the whole world would hate me. i don't fucking CARE! damn it, i have my own life to live. she doesn't have the right to meddle with my decisions. for heaven's sake, i'm fucking twenty-five. yeah, old enough to get hitched, get laid and sooner or later knocked up for all i care. i'm so fucking pissed with nora, yeah that's how we (aimee and i) call her. im fucking fed up with her complaining about me and my decisions in life. yeah she's still my mother but i guess i still have to get hold of my own life. i hate it when she tries so hard to play God. gawd, she ain't one. heaven forbid me, but i fucking hate her. she fucking confiscated my laptop when i need it the most. geesh i need to finish 35 more drawings for my microbio class but since we are not in good terms at the moment she's trying to use that to get on my nerves which is fucking crap!!! i don't know what the hell is wrong with her but she keeps on interrupting my very happy and peaceful life. yeah, i've been thru lotsa nasty stuff yet i'm still here trying to fix things but she just won't quit bringing me down. seems like seeing me suffering makes her happy and satisfied. i fucking hate her. i can go on and on. the point is of all people "WHY ME???!!!" if only i can choose my own family, i'd choose someone who'll accept me as me. this is how i am. take it or leave it. i'm trying to live quietly as i can but she keeps bringing in chaos into my life. the thing that hurts me the most is, the person that should be there for me is the one trying to be the enemy. i'm in a computer shop right now typing while crying. i know it's fucking lame but this is driving me nuts. the agony, the emotional torture, the physical pain is one rollercoaster ride which i fucking want to end. i know this is a hopeless case and there's no point of writing events like this over and over but the hell i care. i don't want to bother honhon, aimee and my friends. it's like a cliche. people get tired of the same old story. but the thing is the issue still lies there. i don't know how, when, where i will get answers. my point is "I'M FUCKING TIRED!!!!" could you please get off my nerves?!!! cut me some fucking slack! i'm human thus i get hurt thus i get tired! arrrrggghhhhhh.......
i have tons of stuff and new pictures but i'm not in the mood. so i'll fucking go now. peace out!


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